lol

June 18, 2008

Aaaaaaaaaghhhhh

Filed under: Animal jokes, Holiday vacation, Husband & wife jokes, Jokes — Tags: , , , , , , , — lol27 @ 9:58 pm

YOU HAVE TO READ THIS FIRST BEFORE LOOKING AT THE PICTURE


Family on vacation in Australia for a week and a half when husband, wife and their 15 year old son decided to go scuba diving. The husband is in the navy and has had some scuba experience.  His son wanted a picture of his mom and dad in all their gear so he got the under water camera ready to go. When it came to taking the picture the dad realized that the son looked like he was panicking as he took it and gave the ‘OK’ hand sign to see if he was all right.   

 

 

 

 

 


 
 
 
 
 



Try to tell me you wouldn’t have emptied your Entire digestive system right at the point you saw it!!!
Would you have stayed to take the picture??

 

 




Maybe what saved them was that the shark wasn’t hungry, they were in the water not on the surface, and there was no fear coming from them only because they were not aware. Probably better that the kid didn’t point for them to look behind them.

Apperantly this is a try story             omg i wouldv ben scared out of my mind!!!!!!!!!!!

April 23, 2008

lol

Filed under: Holiday vacation, Intresting stuff, Jokes, Q&A — lol27 @ 2:43 pm

Here are a few things that you probably never knew, but the commercials helped us to realize.

– When mentioning a product, it is required to say the entire name, and manufacturer.

– When you wash your hair, don’t worry about a hairdryer, just shake your head back and forth with a sexy little motion, and it’ll be dry.

– If you have heartburn, don’t worry!! The person next to you is a doctor.

– If you have heartburn, and your seat partner isn’t a doctor, then your cab driver/bartender/waitress has a bottle of antacid within reach.

– When having large groups of people over for dinner, it is necessary to serve spaghetti and bread rolls. And someone has to spill wine.

– All restaurant owners are Italian

– Your new carpet spray/toilet scrub/shower cleaner will always get out that spilled juice/scum/grease, and leave your carpet/shower/toilet whiter than before

– The person across from you knows what your doctor prescribed, and they have it sitting beside them.

– Every household has one really shaggy dog that sheds all the time.

– Looking for a product that works? A really peppy, and friendly mom will point out that it’s right to your right and above your head!

– The number one choice of medicine in households and clinics around the world are six different brands.

– Hair doesn’t frizz

– Lip color lasts forever

– Amusement parks have special invisible rides that can be seen on T.V., but not in person.

– Your mattress is the worst mattress in the world, but your new mattress is the greatest.

– If you can’t sleep, you’ll shift around madly and frown.

– Everyone sleeps with one hand behind their pillow, one hand on top, and the sheets at their armpits. Unless you are sick.

I bet you never knew any of that! Aren’t you glad that I found out for you

 

These questions about South Africa were posted on a South African Tourism Website and were answered by the website owner –

Q: Does it ever get windy in South Africa? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK) A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? (USA) A: Depends how much you’ve been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Durban to Cape Town – can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden) A: Sure, it’s only two thousand kilometres take lots of water…

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in South Africa? (Sweden) A: So it’s true what they say about Swedes.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in South Africa? Can you send me a list of them in JHB, Cape Town, Knysna and Jeffrey’s Bay? (UK) A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about Koala Bear racing in South Africa? (USA) A: Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the pacific. A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe which does not… oh forget it. Sure, the Koala Bear racing is every Tuesday night in Hillbrow. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is north in South Africa? (USA) A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we’ll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into South Africa? (UK) A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys’ Choir schedule? (USA) A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is…oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Hillbrow, straight after the Koala Bear races. Come naked.

Q: Do you have perfume in South Africa? (France) A: No, WE don’t stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in South Africa?(USA) A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in South Africa where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy) A: Yes, gay nightclubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in South Africa? (France) A: Only at Christmas.

Q: Are there killer bees in South Africa? (Germany) A: Not yet, but for you, we’ll import them.

Q: Are there supermarkets in Cape Town and is milk available all year round? (Germany) A: No, we are a peaceful civilisation of vegan hunter-gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in South Africa who can dispense rattlesnake serum. USA) A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca, which is where YOU come from. All South African snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: I was in South Africa in 1969, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Hillbrow. Can you help? (USA) A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA) A: Yes, but you’ll have to learn it first

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.