Aaaaaaaaaghhhhh

YOU HAVE TO READ THIS FIRST BEFORE LOOKING AT THE PICTURE


Family on vacation in Australia for a week and a half when husband, wife and their 15 year old son decided to go scuba diving. The husband is in the navy and has had some scuba experience.  His son wanted a picture of his mom and dad in all their gear so he got the under water camera ready to go. When it came to taking the picture the dad realized that the son looked like he was panicking as he took it and gave the ‘OK’ hand sign to see if he was all right.   

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 
 
 



Try to tell me you wouldn’t have emptied your Entire digestive system right at the point you saw it!!!Would you have stayed to take the picture??

 

 

Maybe what saved them was that the shark wasn’t hungry, they were in the water not on the surface, and there was no fear coming from them –only because they were not aware. Probably better that the kid didn’t point for them to look behind them.

Apperantly this is a try story             omg i wouldv ben scared out of my mind!!!!!!!!!!!

Grocery shopping

Food Shopping By Women
1. Park the car
2. Get a cart
3. Fill the cart with useful things in a record time.
4. Put the shopping in a rational way (All the fridge stuff together, groceries in a separate bag, etc)
5. Pay
6. Go back home.
7. Empty the bags, put all groceries in the appropriate cabinets, refrigerator compartments, etc., and tidy everything up.

Food Shopping By Men
1. Park the car
2. Get into the store.
3. Get out of the store and pick a cart.
4. Get into the store.
5. Stroll through all the corridors of the store.
6. Stop by the magazines and browse the latest “TIME” magazine
7. Buy a pair of socks, 2 frozen pizzas, a case of beer, sausages, pistachios and a comic (Optional: foldable, swimming pool in winter, Two helmets for the kids in case they are going to use the bicycles, fertilizer (also in winter), and some tools that he might use some day)
8. Don’t worry about milk, bread, eggs and other ’superfluous’ items.
9. Put the socks in the bag with the frozen items.
10. Find the slowest line and pay.
11. Go back home.
12. Leave the bags on the table.
13. Put the beers in the fridge.
14. Sit on the couch and read the comic until the beers are cold.

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lol

A couple drove several miles down a country road, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument, and neither wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules and pigs, the husband sarcastically asked, “Relatives of yours?” “Yep,” the wife replied, “In-laws

 

LOL

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, and he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,”Please wake me at 5:00 AM” He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM – and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn ‘ t wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, “It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.”

MORAL: Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, “Relatives of yours?”
“Yep,” the wife replied, “in-laws”

Women’s Revenge

“Cash, check or charge?” I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.

As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
“So, do you always carry your TV remote?” I asked.
“No,” she replied, ” but my husband refused to come shopping with me and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.”

Who does What

A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, “You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don ‘ t have to wait as long to get our coffee.”
The husband said, ” You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.”
Wife replies, “No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.”
Husband replies, “I can ‘ t believe that, show me.”
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament
and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed
says……….”HEBREWS”

MORAL: God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

WORDS

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day… 30,000 to a man’s 15,000.

The wife replied, “The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men…
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, “What?”